Dear Arthur
by redlily188
Summary: "Dear Arthur, I'm a warlock..." Merlin gets mad at Arthur and skips town. Merlin and Arthur exchange letters as Arthur tries to get him back. No slash. Full of humory goodness! Dedicated to Word-Stringer
1. Chapter 1

**This is a plot-bunny that I cannot get out of my head, and I won't be able to sleep until it's written down. I really, really hope this doesn't take all night, because I have FOUR tests tomorrow and a quiz! UGH! But you know how you, wonderful person, can make it better? REVIEW! Because I love reviews. They're my favorite. Please? **

**Set during Season 3: Merlin skips town, leaving Arthur a note. Pretty self explanatory, no?**

Dear Arthur,

Guess what? I'm a warlock! Yeah, that's right. My eyes flash gold AND EVERYTHING! I know what you're thinking right now, something about 'I, the great thick Prince of Camelot, must tell my father about this!'. Yeah, well, you can't. I'm gone. So TAKE THAT.

And before you think about assembling all of your knights to look high and low for me, there are two things that you should consider:

Camelot really needs all the knights it can get. Do you have any idea how many people have escaped your dungeons? I mean, seriously? You suck as a knight trainer.

I've saved your life so many times! I'd list them all, but I'd prefer not to kill every tree in Albion! I'm a tree hugger, you know that.

But I will state some examples on how I've saved your life. Remember that time you got bit by the Questing Beast and then got better? That's because I sacrificed my life for you. Don't know what I was thinking, really. Obviously it didn't go down to plan, because I'm still here. Well, not here, here. Because I ditched Camelot. But I'm still alive. Don't think it was easy, though! My mother almost died! And then Gaius! But have no fear; I used my amazing magical powers to fix everything! You're welcome.

Let's see, what else? That time you thought that oaf Cendric was the one that saved your life? That was me. WITH MAGIC, thank you very much. But did I get the credit? No! You let some buffoon lick your boots, and almost let Camelot be destroyed! I took him down in the end, no worries. But did I get a thank you? Of course not!

Also, that time you 'killed' the dragon? PUH-LEASE. That was me! Do you honestly think that your sword could do anything to a DRAGON! No! You got knocked out, you dollop-head! And what did I have to do? Save the day with my mystical dragon-lord powers! That's right, I'm a warlock AND a dragon-lord. Double wammie! And what are you? A prince! Just a prince. Loser.

I've saved your life countless other times too. And your girlfriend's. But I don't regret that. She's a good friend, unlike YOU. Friends don't make friends muck out their stables 24/7!

Oh and you killed my girlfriend. Thanks a lot, _buddy_.

You're probably wondering why I saved your life a bunch of times. This is going to sound really stupid, but…the dragon told me. Yeah, the same one that tried to destroy Camelot. I honestly think that guy's bipolar. But that's besides the point.

The point is that you and I had a destiny together! And I know what you're thinking again- GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER. That's disgusting. Although I am good looking. Once again, getting off topic.

My destiny was to help you fulfill your destiny- become a great king and unite all of Albion. Well, I tried for four _very _long years. But making me muck out the stables in that blizzard yesterday was the last straw!

Camelot can fall, burn, and _die _for all I care! No amount of peace is worth putting up with you! You're a spoilt arrogant brat with the brains of a donkey and the face of a TOAD. That line sound familiar? Dragoon the Great was ME. As stated before, that was to save your girlfriend!

But because you tried to save me from that poisoned chalice that one time (see that word tried? That's because I helped you. That magical glowing orb was me helping you!) I'll give you a warning. Morgana, she's your sister. AND SHE'S EVIL! I don't know how many times she's plotted to take over Camelot and failed! I think stupidity runs in Pendragon blood.

As you can see by the examples listed above, MAGIC IS GOOD if used in the correct way. Your sister has magic (but she's not as powerful as me; I'm just awesome like that), but she uses it for evil! I, however, used it correctly. And I always shall! Just not for you.

Anyway, I'm long gone by now. I'm considering going to Cendrid's Kingdom. Maybe his son won't be such a clotpole!

With Ever-lasting Annoyance,

Merlin

PS: You should've said thank you. Then I wouldn't be gone.

PSS: You're a fat pratt. Lay of the carbs.


	2. Chapter 2

**Alright….I'm having Arthur write back. And you know why that is? Because YOU asked for it! Also, I was pretty impressed by the number of reviews I got. NINETEEN. In less than a span of 24 hours! So I'd like to say thank you! And I hope you enjoy Arthur's…pretty legit reply. (In my opinion)**

**I'm not really sure how this letter actually gets to Merlin, but it just does, ok?**

**Oh yeah, review!**

Dear Merlin,

Shut up. Nobody cares if you're a warlock. Or a dragon-lord. You're still and idiot! And so what if your eyes flash gold? My eyes are BEAUTIFUL blue! Do you know how many people have complimented my eyes? MORE THAN THE TIMES YOU'VE SAVED MY LIFE. So ha.

Contradicting my statement before- if my father _ever _found out about your 'talents' (Which aren't really talents, it's called being a freak of nature) you'd be DEAD. But, as my way of saying _thank you_, I won't tell my father. So there you go.

But in reply to your letter- I do NOT suck as a knight trainer. They just don't listen. Like somebody I know. Gee, I wonder who that is, _Mer_lin.

And a prince is _very_ important. This makes me the future king for goodness sakes! KING. Nobody cares about _warlock_. King is much better. I quote, 'My destiny was to help you fulfill your destiny- become a great king and unite all of Albion' So, you're the helper! NOT THE BIG MAN. Yeah, that's right. I just used your own words against you. And in the process I just proved that I'm not thick.

Were you seriously Dragoon the Great? Because if you were…I assume you just used an aging spell. So if that's what you're going to look like in 80 years….ugh. I think you'd be better off keeling over or something. You're looks weren't that great.

In regards to your advice…I've been watching Morgana. Now that I've been paying more attention, I see her smirk. Quite a lot, actually. Honestly, how did I not notice that before? And she's my sister? That's slightly weird

I tried pointing out her smirks to my father, but he got mad. So mad, in fact, that he threw me in the dungeons! Well, I see who the favorite child is! That whole thing you were talking about with Camelot falling, burning, and dying? I slightly concur.

But as my princely duty (because I'm a really good one, despite your unimportant opinion) I shall not allow that to happen! And if you really have been saving me then you need to get your lazy, idiotic, useless, pale, prattling warlock butt back here. I'm too young (and good looking) to die.

If you decide not to do what I request I WILL hunt you down. And as you've seen from past hunting trips (which you don't enjoy because you're a sissy) I'm a _very _good hunter. Also, I'd like to point out that my handwriting is much better than yours. Mine is actually legible. Do you know how long it took me to read your letter? HOURS. So, if you're going to be an idiot and not come back to Camelot, but instead reply with a letter you should A. Have somebody else do it or B. Use your 'awesome' magical powers to get the job done.

Get back here Merlin, or I'll find you and your only job will be to muck out the stables.

With Even More Everlasting Annoyance,

Arthur, Prince of Camelot.

PS: I'll never say thank you directly.

PSS: I'm NOT fat. You're just an anorexic pale little boy who's jealous of my buffness.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, ok. I'll make this a full blown out story just for YOU. After so many pleads to write more I thought 'Ah, what the heck. Might as well.' So I'm doing it. Which means I'll officially mark this story as 'incomplete' and you can add it to your story alert list. I'll do my best to update this everyday!**

**Thanks to everybody who reviewed! They always make me super happy! Read, enjoy, and review!**

Dear Arthur,

If you think about it- I can't shut up, because I'm technically not saying anything, just writing. And I may still be an idiot, but there was that one time you called me wise! Remember? Right before Cendred was trying to overtake Camelot? By the way, those skeletons were Morgana's doing. And I STOPED HER. But you and your brainless father thought that she saved the day! You cannot know how annoyed I was. Sorry, wrong tense. How annoyed I _am_.

Speaking of Morgana, what's she up to? Has she attempted anymore assassinations yet? I wouldn't be surprised if you never read this simply because without me Morgana's probably got you dead. Honestly, with all your sword playing it won't stand a chance against magic. Oh yeah, you _do _suck as a knight trainer. And I do listen! Most of the time.

Now that I'm on the topic of how magic is so much better than waving a sword around like a fool- I'm so much cooler than you. As a prince/king (if you make it that far without me) all you do is order people to do stuff. I, on the other hand, can do many things on my own!

I'll only list a few, because once again I don't want to kill trees. Let's see: I freeze objects, slow time down, make inanimate objects move (how do you think I got so many of your chores done? You'd pile them on me like there was no tomorrow! Jerk.) all WITHOUT SAYING A WORD. That's right. I've been able to do all that before I could talk! So take that.

And with words I can do so many things- Like heat water, light fire, save Camelot and your butt- you know, the usual.

You're not going to tell your father? Really? Well, gee Arthur, I'm _so _grateful. When I'm gone you do that. So very kind of you. Prat.

Yes, I was Dragoon the Great. And how dare you insult my looks! I think I aged some sixty years! I'd like to see you look that good! And seeing that I'm still better looking right now (my eyes are so much better) I bet you'll be a lot worse off than me!

You got thrown in the dungeons? Why is it that I'm always that whenever you have to go there I'm unable to see you? I think it'd be so much fun to poke fun at you! Last time I was on my death bed, and right now I'm partying with the dragon!

Guess what? I'm not coming back. I prefer living with the dragon. Since I'm his master and everything, I get to order him around! But I usually don't, which is more than I can say to you!

And you're not going to be able to come get me! If you had to sneak out to get the flower that would save my life Uther surely wouldn't let you go looking for me! Unless you tell him I'm a sorcerer, which would surely bring about my downfall, so I'm sure you won't do that.

That's right. I just outwitted you.

And you'll notice that I made my handwriting extra sloppy this time. You're welcome.

Glad That I'll Never Be Seeing You Again,

Merlin, Great Warlock

PS: You're stupid.

PSS: You are fat. Don't kid yourself.


	4. Chapter 4

**I really like reviews….enough said. Enjoy!**

Dear Merlin,

I don't care if you're not really saying anything. Shut up. And you're right, I did call you wise that one time, but right after that I reminded you that you are still (and always will be) an idiot. Really? Morgana got the credit for saving the day, even though she really was the villain? And you didn't get any credit? I'm laughing at you right now. Poor, poor, unnoticed Merlin. Idiot.

I would tell you what Morgana has been up to, but then you'd feel no reason to come back to Camelot. So why don't you just come back yourself and find out _Mer_lin? This whole running away thing is quite annoying. But have no fear, Merlin, if you do not return I will come find you.

Magic isn't all that great, Merlin. Especially in Camelot. I mean, I get noticed every day, do I not? People bow at my feet, kiss my hand, and wish they were me _every day_. Does that ever happen to you? I think not. In fact, only few people know you at all!

Now, if you came back to Camelot and helped me fulfill my destiny (not that I couldn't do it on my own) you could go down in history! Then you could get a lot of fame, and everyone would know your name! I can see it now, 'Merlin the Great.' Not as cool as 'Arthur the Magnificent', but still nice nonetheless.

And you should be grateful that I'm not telling my father! If I did he'd have you found and be tied up on that pyre! And despite how annoying your prattle is, I still wouldn't want to see you in flames! It would, however, give me a chance to get a new servant. Any of them would be better than you.

Speaking of servants, my room is a mess. You need to get back here, and do my laundry, make my bed, scrub my floors, polish my chainmail, sharpen my sword, scrub my boots, dust my whole corridor, brush my horses, wash my windows, clean my room, repair my saddle, polish my helmet, walk my dog, sweep my fireplace, fix my armor, and oh yeah, _much my out stables_.

You think it's funny that I got thrown in the dungeons? I swear, if you were in my sight right now I'd throw a candlestick at you! You know what? I think it's funny when you get thrown in the dungeons! And don't even get my started about the stocks. In fact, when I hunt you down I'll be throwing _potatoes _at you myself. That's right. Potatoes, not tomatoes. And I'll make sure to find the largest and hardest potatoes in all of Camelot. And you know I can do it.

You think you look better than me? I disagree. I have a girlfriend; you on the other hand, do not. You're just a hermit living in a cave with a dragon! And you have nothing better to do than do a bunch of hocus pocus and make things soar around. I think it's pretty obvious that I'm the better one here.

Guess what? You _are_ coming back. I don't care if you like the dragon better than me. He may be bigger, but his destiny surely isn't as great as mine! And I'm supposed to order you around, _Mer_lin, it's my _job_. And your job is to obey me! So get back here.

And do you really think that I'm going to let my father stop me? You say that I'm thick! I'm going to sneak out and save you, of course. Just like the time I saved Gwen. I had no problem then, right?

Speaking of Gwen, she misses you. She told me to inform you that she wants you back, because 'you're a great friend'. I'm not sure what she's talking about there. The only reason I want you back is because I need someone to muck my stables, and with all the training you've had you're the best man for the job.

The reason your handwriting is so sloppy is because you're highly uneducated. You fail.

Glad That I'll Be Able To Prove You Wrong and Capture You,

Arthur, Future King of Camelot.

PS: I am not stupid. I have received the highest educated in Camelot.

PSS: I. Am. _Not_. Fat. _Mer_lin.


	5. Chapter 5

**Nine reviews for chapter four…let's see if we can top that! (hint, hint)**

**And I'm going to do some advertising here (:**

**If you really like this story, then I suggest you read these one-shots by me as well:**

_**Arthur and Merlin Go Shopping for Jewelry**_

_**The Beginning of Secrets**_

_**Secret Friendship**_

**They're all Arthur and Merlin friendship based. If you do read them, remember to review! (:**

Dear Arthur,

You say that you don't care about a lot of stuff, but you know what? I think you do. You just pretend not to care, because you're afraid of showing your emotions. But you know, it wouldn't hurt to show them every once in a while. For example: I bet Gwen would be a lot more responsive to you if you actually showed that you cared, instead of holding your head high like the praty proud prince you are. Also, if you had shown a little appreciation of me, then I wouldn't be gone! And you wouldn't have to deal with my terrible handwriting.

And you say I'm not wise? I think that paragraph above seems pretty wise. The dragon agreed with me, and you know how dragons are; they're very smart and good advice givers. Even if sometimes (most of the time) I don't follow his advice.

Wow. You're really not going to tell me what Morgana's been up to? That's low, Arthur, even for your sense of dollupheadness. Not like I care anyways. Like I said in my first letter; I don't care about Camelot anymore. Least of all its arrogant prince.

Your statement about 'magic isn't all that great' is completely false. You're just terribly jealous that you can't change the weather, light fires, play pranks on arrogant prince's… That's right, I went there. Remember that time you were knight training, and you started making fun of me and then lost your sword. Then you got his by that mace? Yeah, I was the reason you lost your sword. So take that, clot pole.

The only reason people bow at your feet is because they're trying to get away of your awful body odor. And they kiss your hand, because they have to, not because they want to. And the only reason people wish they were you is because they would enjoy hanging out with me all day, like you _used _to do. But not anymore. You selfish arrogant brat.

I recall a time in which you once told me you enjoyed my prattle. Your exact words were: 'It pains me to admit it, but I do enjoy your silly retorts. In fact, it's probably your only redeemable feature'. That was when we were looking for my _father_. That's right, Balinor was my father. Feel bad for me.

You really think assigning me chores is going to make me come back? How about, no. Remember that time I left for two days and said I was dying? I really _was_ dying. Your sister (and her sister, Morgause. I think I forgot to mention that earlier) left me to die to the scorpions! Not to worry though, I used my awesome dragon-lord powers and had the Great Dragon save me. But that's beside the point. The point is that I had only been gone for two days, and you're room was a complete pigsty! Honestly, can you do anything for yourself? I hate to think what it's like now.

Yes, I do think it's funny that you got thrown in the dungeons. And you know, threatening to throw candles at me and put me in the stocks isn't going to make me want to come back either. You should really change tactics if you want to get anywhere.

By the way, I am better looking than you. The only reason I don't have a girlfriend is because YOU KILLED HER YOU DOLLUPHEAD. I seriously think you need to apologize for that. How would you feel if I killed Gwen? Not that I would, because that would be terrible. And I'm not a jerk!

Alright, look here, you prat. The only reason you were able to save Gwen that one time was because I was there helping you with my magic! So no, I don't think that'll you'll be able to come and get me.

Tell Gwen I miss her too. But also tell her that I cannot come back until her boyfriend stops being such a clot pole.

Don't insult my handwriting again, or I'll enchant the next letter I sent you with an itching spell.

With Much Hate,

Merlin, Better Than the Future King of Camelot,

PS: I think you meant "highest education" not "highest educated". I think you just helped me prove the whole "you're stupid" theory.

PSS: Stop eating so many sausages, and maybe you'll lose some weight.


	6. Chapter 6

**Well, today I had a family tragedy. So what do I turn to? MERLIN! Because it always makes me feel better. Thank goodness for Merlin! I'm really sorry if this isn't as funny as it should be, but my mood is so low right now.**

**You know what you can do to make it better? **

**Review.**

Dear Merlin,

I do too show my emotions! Every once in a while…the only reason I don't tell them to you is because you'll find some annoying way to give me advice, and I really don't like it when you appear smarter than me! Because you're not!

And I'll have you know that Guinevere and I communicate a lot! Just the other day we secretly smiled at each other in the hall! So take that! But she seemed a bit sad, Merlin, and I blame you! Please get back here! For Guinevere's sake, though. She misses you. I, however, only want you back to make her happy. So get your idiot-self back here!

I've started looking for you, and I've actually had to sneak into Cenrad's Kingdom. My first stop was Ealdor, but you mother said that you had only stayed for one night a week ago. She wanst me to tell you that you need to get back to me, and that you need to remember what she said about the coin. What the hell was she talking about? Have you been stealing money from me? !

I don't care what the dragon says; he attacked Camelot and wounded me! Therefore, he is not very high on my list. But you know what, _Mer_lin, he's higher up than you!

I really don't enjoy being by myself looking for you. I couldn't bring any of my knights, simply because my father wouldn't allow it. The forest is too quiet without your useless prattle, and despite how annoying it is I don't like silence. Unless I'm hunting, but even then you can _never_ be quiet. If you're not snapping a twig or tripping of a log, then you're dropping something! You're so clumsy! And such a _girl_! You're the only man that actually gets afraid on hunting trips!

You're starting to sound a bit arrogant, Merlin. People do not wish they were me, because they wish to see you every day; they want to be me because I'm the greatest person their ever was! What's not to like about me? I'm strong, rich, a good huntsman, a good prince, and not to mention _very _good looking. Despite what you, my useless manservant, thinks. And oh yeah, I do not smell bad!

Yes, I do somewhat enjoy your prattle. And I back up my statement; it is your only redeemable feature. And the fact that you've saved my life so many times. But that's it. If it weren't for those two things, I wouldn't be sleeping under a tree on my quest for you right now.

I had been curious as to why you were so upset about a man that you had just met. I'm very sorry about your father, and if I could've died in his place to ease your pain, I would have. Perhaps if you can come back Camelot, we can create a memorial for him. Unbeknownst to my father, of course. But we can still do it nonetheless.

Well, seeing that I now know that you have magic, I do not doubt that you've been using it to help (and when I say help, I mean do the whole thing) with your chores this whole time! And I'll tell you what; if you come back I'll help you slip some rat stew to Morgana. Her smirks are getting so annoying, and I'm beginning to think that it's the only facial expression she does have! Which is a reason why I'm glad to get out of Camelot; I don't have to watch her face twist up every day. It gives me the chills. I know that she's planning my assassination!

Yes, you did for get to mention that Morgause and Morgana were sisters! I think that might have been nice to know! I was wondering why she was talking about her sister to herself (she didn't know that I was standing behind her), but I had just assumed that she has gone senile.

Well, if you were able to use your dragon-lord powers to save you then I guess the whole almost dying part doesn't matter! Besides, I have never asked you to sacrifice your life for me! After all, I believe it was _I _who drank the poison, when we were dealing with the whole unicorn fiasco, so ha.

I..I'm truly sorry about killing your girlfriend. But she was a threat to Camelot and…well, I didn't exactly know it was a girlfriend, or a girl for that matter! You know I could never hurt a girl! Which is the reason I lost to Morgause that one time; it wasn't because she's a better swords(wo)man than me. But back to the matter at hand…I'm sorry I killed your girlfriend. Next time, if you ever get a girlfriend, tell me who she is, and I'll make sure not to hurt her. (Unless she hurts you, then she's going down. Not because I'm protective of you or anything, but I can't have my manservant getting hurt. Somebody needs to polish my chainmail.)

I think that the fact that I'm looking for you proves that I'm not being a clot pole! And because I don't want to be itching all over, I won't insult your handwriting again.

You Don't Really Hate Me,

Prince Arthur, Future King of Camelot and Much Better Than the Warlock Manservant

PS: Shut up, Merlin. At least I'm not a girl's petticoat.

PSS: But I love sausages!


	7. Chapter 7

**Wow. You guys are absolutely amazing! Not only did a bunch of people review, but many of you offered your condolences as well! Thank you so much! Yesterday I was thinking that the whole world was terrible, and there was nothing good in it! But you guys have reconvinced me that everybody does have some good in them, even if they are nefarious people. **

**Kilgharrah: You're determination it goodness in people will be your undoing, just as it was Merlin's.**

**Me:….Shut up. I'm trying not to be a hater, ok?**

**There we go. I hope me and my dragon buddy entertained you. Now, on to the story. Or letter. Or whatever. Anyway, thanks again for making me feel better!**

Dear Arthur,

Arthur, you don't have to tell me your emotions to make me appear smarter than you. You simply living does it. I know, that was a bit harsh, but it's the truth.

Oh yeah, smiling in the hallway is real communication! I'm sure you guys send signals through your head too. Which is actually possible, you know. I do it with Mordred all the time. But him and I really don't like each other anymore; it was something about me trying to kill him, I believe. Hmm…the same thing happened with Morgana.

I blame the dragon. He told me that Mordred would assure your doom (so try to stay away from that kid, alright?", and that Morgana had to be killed because she was the source of the curse put on Camelot. So if I've gained you enemies, I'm sorry. Blame the dragon, not me.

By the way, he's the one that started this whole "two sides to one coin" thing. Apparently my mother could see it to. I think she wants me to come back and protect you, but she doesn't know what I have to deal with! 'Do this Merlin, do that Merlin, I don't care if you get thrown in the stocks or die Merlin, just do it'. And I think it's obvious who the brighter side of the coin is.

You're in Cenrad's Kingdom? Arthur, get out of there! That's where Morgause is hiding out, and without me by your side you are a very easy target! You know why that is? It's because swords can do nothing against magic. Well, except for this one…

Well, I might as well tell you. Remember way back when, and your Uncle was set on revenge for your dad killing your mom? Wait..um…scratch that. Um, the creepy dead guy coming back to life? Yeah, well, the only way you can kill something that is dead is with a sword forged from a dragon's breath. Because I thought you were going to have to face this guy I got my good friend here to make you one, but then your father fought with it and…it was all a mess, really. But here's the point: I have a sword for you, and it's the most powerful of all time. It's at the bottom of a lake right now, but I'm thinking about taking it out and putting it in a stone. I'm not quite sure why, but I think it's because I have a fetish for stones.

Me? Me? _Me_, arrogant? You are such a dollop head! And a hypocrite! And a whole lot of other words…but if you ever do find me; I don't want to die. So I'll refrain from saying it. I'll just tell Kilgharrah it, and we'll have a great time making fun of you. He's still mad about you wounding his shoulder, even though it didn't hurt him. His favorite nickname for you is "The Once and Future Prat". I still prefer clot pole.

And oh yeah, you do smell bad. Revolting, in fact. Almost as bad as the troll your father married a while back.

If you don't like looking for me so much, then why are you doing it? Go home Arthur. Actually, you know what? I'm in a pretty good mood, because I one a poker game against the Dragon, and he owes me four jars in pickled eggs! So see if you can crack this code. In it is a hint.

jfeiji-ejfoeixIxeo-ijxMxeoijfswe-ixNxiqefsxOxabwe-oiangxTxiweo-urexIxwi-ejfxCxwoei-rufjxAxoeiu-reiojxMxiruxEx-woeijxLxoietwxO-xoidjsxTx

There you go. And good luck.

You'd seriously be willing to make a memorial for my father? Wow. I really appreciate that Arthur, and I most definitely will take you up on that offer…but I really like receiving pickled eggs from Kilgharrah. So maybe another time, how about that? Besides, it's kind of funny that you have to sleep all alone, make your own fire, and carry your own stuff around on your quest for me.

Hey! I only had magic to help me do chores at the very beginning! But then one time I was playing around with it and did a little trick with smoke. But I got caught, and Gaius, Morgana, and I all almost died! So I've been much more cautious after that. But the threat still hasn't stopped me from playing pranks on you.

I don't care if you didn't ask me to sacrifice my life for you! You're should still be grateful you little ingrate! And I wanted to drink the poison, but you tricked me! Which was quite stupid of me, because that's the oldest trick in the book! I'm so disappointed in myself.

Well, I guess I forgive you for killing my girlfriend. After all, you had a lot of pressing issues on your mind. Like that fact that I thought you needed to lose weight (which you do, but we'll get to that later). I'll also forgive you because, no matter how much you try to deny it, I can tell to you really do care about me. And polish your own chainmail.

Nope, you're still a clot pole.

Lots of Laughter,

Merlin, Much Better Than "The Once and Future Prat".

PS: At least I'm not a clot pole.

PSS: I know you love sausages, but they really do add up!

**You guys can try to figure out the code if you'd like, but if you can't then I'll reveal what it says and how to solve it tomorrow! Thanks for reading! And let me know if you see any mistakes, because I'm tired right now, and I don't know if I caught everything! Please ignore the hyphens; they're just there so FanFiction won't think I'm spamming with a bunch of random letters.**

**Thanks! Review xD (Thank you Word-Stringer for teaching me that face, I love it.)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Oh. My. Gosh! Can you believe that we're up to 101 reviews (and counting) I'm SO happy! This is the highest I've ever gotten in the amount of reviews! Seriously, I'm having a party in my head. I had a brownie, too!**

**I have to awards to give out.**

_**Captain Arianna Trouble**_**: First person to figure out the code! Congratulations! And for those of you who had trouble figuring it out, look between two x's, and there will be a will be a capital letter. For example iexOxyu would be a O. So you can go figure that out right now, or you can just continue reading. Arthur cracked it. Surprised? Me too.**

_**Merlin's First Love**_**: YOU'RE THE 100****TH**** REVIEWER! –claps! And you know what you get for that? A BRAND NEW CARRRR. Just kidding. You actually get nothing, other than this shout out. I mean, I would give you a car, but I really don't have that kind of money lying around. **

**And if I don't update for a couple of days, my sincerest apologies. I think I'm coming down with strep throat (Great. Just Great.), so I don't know if I'll be feeling well enough to write! –sobs at the thought of withdrawal-**

**But HOPEFULLY I don't have that, and that way I'll be able to continue writing! Also, please let me know of any mistakes in this chapter! My little flu is messing with my head, and I'm super sorry if something doesn't make sense! -cries-**

**Review? **

Dear Merlin,

You are not smarter than me! Just because you can come up with a few 'wise' words every once in a while doesn't make you smart! I bet your dragon friend said it, and you just plagiarized him. If I were him, I'd catch you on fire.

Merlin, I just thought of something. How did the Dragon escape from the dungeons? Were you the cause of that?

You tried killing that sweet boy! WAIT. That's what took you so long that night I was in the process of freeing Mordred from the dungeons! You almost let us get caught! But you say that's because he's the cause of my doom? Oh…well…umm…I really don't know what to say to that, quite honestly. On one hand, he's a little boy, but on the other…he was really creepy.

I would blame the dragon, but it's a lot more fun blaming you. Wait..I don't know if I want to do that. I've been writing Guinevere, and she says that I need to be nicer to you for you to come back. So, I blame the dragon…I guess. Wow, that was really hard to write. Probably the hardest thing ever.

Speaking of Guinevere, I miss sneaking glances at her. Merlin, we seriously need to get back to Camelot. How much longer are you going to keep up this silly charade? It's convenient not too look at Morgana's hideous smirks every day, but I'm getting kind of worried about my father. I mean, without me or you there, he's hopeless! Sir Leon's a good knight and everything, but he's the sharpest sword in the armory.

There's a sword that can kill dead people! I want that sword! And don't you dare make me pull it out of a stone Merlin…that's just completely ludicrous. What's the point in that? That's not a story that will impress future generations. "Yeah, and then this Arthur guy (they'll probably call me Wart, just because the idea is so ridiculous) pulled this sword out of a stone and became king." Pretty boring stuff, if you ask me. And it most defiantly will not inspire future generations. Now me having to slay an army to get to it, that's pretty entertaining stuff.

So, you'll never guess who I met in the forest the other day! This druid guy! I can't quite remember his name, because it was a weird name. Speaking of weird names, he asked me if I was looking for Emry's! I said that I didn't know an Emry's, and you know what he did? He laughed at my face! And called me 'a complete unobservant fool'! And then he proceeded to tell me that when I did find this Emry's guy, that I needed to tell him that he needed to come get the cup of life. I suppose you wouldn't know anything about that, would you, _Mer_lin?

'The Once and Future Prat'? Where'd you get that from? Am I called "The Once and Future King' or something? I actually like that name. Not the prat one, but the king one.

Merlin, I do NOT smell bad! I bathe once a week and always have clean clothes! You on the other hand are a completely different story! You bathe what, once every five months? And do you ever actually wash that red scarf that you're always wearing? Which gives me an idea…If I buy you a new one, will you come back to Camelot?

Why am I looking for you? Why am I looking for you? Why do you _think _I'm looking for you?

Pickled eggs? Those are my favorite! I want to play some poker with the dragon!

Well, after hours…I mean minutes…of trying to crack the code, I did it. IM NOT IN CAMELOT. Despite what I originally thought, that's actually pretty useful information. Like that one time I told you to get out of Camelot when my father married the troll, and you had actually been there the whole time? It's actually quite a relief, really. It would be terrible if I was looking for you this whole time, and you were actually in Camelot.

Merlin…come back. I hate making my own fire! It's so hard! Probably the hardest thing I've ever done! How do you do it?

You still play pranks on me? I'll keep that in mind next time I trip over nothing. You'll find yourself sweeping every room in the castle!

That was the oldest trick in the book, and I was actually quite surprised that you fell for it. I once told you that you're smarter than you look…and you are, but that's not saying much. So don't feel so please.

I am not a clot pole! You, however, are an idiot.

Even More Laughter,

The Once and Future King

PS: At least I'm not an idiot.

PSS: Don't even say that about my sausages! I'll have you executed for that!


	9. Chapter 9

**Guess what! I don't have strep! I have the flu. Ha. Fun.**

**Well, I stayed home from school today and EVERYTHING. Guess what I did? If you guessed 'watch Merlin all day' you're right! It was mostly the commentaries, though. That Bradley James! He's so funny!**

**Surprised that I'm writing even though I have the flu? Me too. But you know when you're sick, and your brain just doesn't seem to SHUT UP? That never ending series of thoughts swirling around your mind? That's what's happening to me. So I thought 'might as well write'. **

**If this chapter doesn't make sense, please let me know. I'm not sure how much sense I'm making now, and I'll probably end up prattling this whole chapter. So if this majorly sucks, let me know, and when I'm better I'll take it down and REDO it. But if you like it…well…then I guess I'm not as crazy as I thought! I mean, you guys liked last nights, which surprised me greatly. I guess I'm a better writer than I thought! –jumps happily and then coughs and sighs-**

**I'm glad that so many people got my "The Sword in the Stone" references! Props to T.H. White and Disney! There will actually be more references in this chapter.**

**Also, I'm starting to run out of ideas to pass between the boys. So when you review (which you should ALWAYS do xD) please put some topics that you'd like the boys to discuss!**

Dear Arthur,

I did not plagiarize the dragon! I became wise all on my own! Besides, the legends clearly state that I'm going to be your wisest and most trustful advisor. But the legends also said that you're going to be a great king and unite all of Albion, but I don't see how that's going to happen. In fact, I'm starting to doubt the legends myself.

You know, one time the dragon did try to catch me on fire. I don't quite remember why it was, but I'm pretty sure it's because I made him mad about something. He gets mad really easily, you know. Luckily he can't hurt me anymore, because I have these magnificent dragon-lord powers! You, on the other hand, do not. So you'd better watch it.

Me? Let the dragon out of the dungeons? Um..well..actually, I'd usually lie to you, but seeing as we're going to get everything out in the open; I might as well tell the truth. Yeah, I let the dragon go. But in my defense, it was the only way to save Camelot! He wouldn't give me advice on how to save Camelot unless I promised to let him go! I swore on my mother's life and everything! And you know how important she is to me!

Yes! Mordred is bad! B.A.D. As in: reprehensible, malevolent, despicable, wicked, immoral, malicious, antagonistic, and nefarious! But I don't think you know what any of the words I just listed mean, so let's try this one-EVIL. Or I could also say Morgana. But personally, I think Morgana is a bit more wicked right now, because I haven't heard from Mordred since I tried to kill him. I think he's giving me the silence treatment. I prefer that, than what Morgana's doing.

I concur with Gwen. You do need to be nicer. Also, why do you feel the need to always call her Guinevere? Everybody else calls her Gwen! I mean, I'm sure you think it's special to call her by a different name than everybody else, but she doesn't like to be called that! Hence the reason she goes by Gwen! She doesn't like her name! So why don't you just call her Gwen for once? Even old fashioned Gaius calls her Gwen!

You're worried about your father? Boo hoo! Go back and protect him, then! Actually, I'm quite shocked that Camelot isn't destroyed yet, with both you and me gone! Uther is more hopeless than you, and that's really saying something!

But I want to put the sword in the stone! You know what? I think you're wrong! Someday somebody will write a book called "The Sword in the Stone"! Besides, the dragon told me that people will never thing that you're stupid. He said that you'll be known for your great legacy as King of Camelot…if you get me back. Which you won't, so you might as well give up now.

And if you dare insult my sword in the stone idea one more time, I'll turn you into a fish, bird, or squirrel! That's right, I went there.

I'm Emrys! It's my legendary name, and all the druids call me by it! That's right, I have fans. You didn't know that, did you? HA! And you are an unobservant fool. I agree with him completely.

He wants me to come get the cup of life? That's surprising. I thought I had left that cup on the Isle of the Blessed! You're probably really confused right now, which is understandable. Let's just say it was one of the experiences in which I saved your life with, to make a long story short.

I prefer "The Once and Future Prat" as does the dragon. Two against one, we win.

Hey! Do not offend my bathing schedule! Not my fault I'm not a prince, and I don't get to bath everyday! Not everybody has that luxury, _Ar_thur. See what I did with your name there? Now maybe you'll know what it feels like to be belittled!

Would you really give me a new red neckerchief? That and a memorial for my father? You're getting pretty desperate, Arthur. But no, my love for pickled eggs gets stronger and stronger every day. And no, you cannot play poker with the dragon. You might beat him, and he hates losing. The only reason I haven't been fried is because, again, I have epic dragon-lord powers.

Yes, Arthur! Why are you looking for me? Come on, fess up! Tell.

You actually figured out the code? You're not as dumb as I thought! I suppose that you're a little bit less of a clot pole than I thought! But still a clot pole, nonetheless.

Well, I actually never make the fire manually. It's more like magically…tell you what, try whispering _forbearnan_ a few times and see if that works. That's how I do it.

You're not only a clot pole, but a pratish dollop head as well. And calling me an idiot isn't going to convince me to come back Camelot.

Enjoying My Picked Eggs,

The Always Wizard

PS: Again with the idiot thing! Not going to get me to come back!

PSS: Arthur, sausages are fattening! The sun sets in the west, and sausages contain fat! It's a fact of life!


	10. Chapter 10

**I've decided that I'm only going to do two letters after this and add an epilogue to it. A very wise reviewer told me that if I continue on with the story when I don't want to it will DIE. I'm very sad to have it end, but I'm running out of ideas. But I hope you enjoy the next three chapters!**

**Also, I'd like to dedicate this story to ****Word-Stringer****, because this wonderful person always puts up with editing my work! ****Word-Stringer**** not only edits my stories but also reviews EVERYTIME. And also puts up with my random one-shots! So thank you!**

**And thanks to everybody for the ideas! You're too kind xD**

Dear Merlin,

Do not doubt the legends! You once told me that it's impossible to break away from your destiny, so take your own advice! Help me become a great king! If you do I…this is going to be _very _difficult…I…I won't…make you..muck-out-my-stables-anymore.

That. Was. The. Hardest. Thing. I've. Ever. Done. I hope you're happy, _Mer_lin.

MERLIN. How could you let the DRAGON out of the dungeons? Really? To help you save Camelot? But then he tried to destroy it? Surely you had some sense of what he was going to do! I'm sorry, Merlin, I know I'm not supposed to say this but: You. Are. An. Idiot. Ok, I won't call you that anymore.

Pft. Merlin, I knew what all those words mean! But I do believe that Morgana can be a synonym of all those words. I just got word from Camelot…Apparently Sir Leon has been noticing Morgana's smirks. In his letter he said, 'I see why you left. I don't know what she's smirking about, but it's getting terribly annoying.' Poor Sir Leon.

Merlin, I don't even want to hear it. She's my girlfriend, and I can call her whatever I want! I bet if I had some fan girls that heard me saying her name they'd be like 'I just _love_ the way Prince Arthur says Guinevere!'

I'm am not going back to Camelot without you! Why can't you get that through you thick skull! Idi-never mind.

I really, really want to see this sword. And if you say I have to pull it out a sword to get it then fine! I'll pull it out of the stupid stone. As long as you come back, and I get the sword I'll be fine.

…You're..legendary name is…Emrys? I'm sorry, Merlin, but that's not really something to be proud of! That's the second oddest name I've ever heard! (Merlin being the first) And I am not an unobservant fool! I'm just distracted by my, ah, princely duties!

Isle of the Blessed? Merlin, what is it you exactly do in your free time? Go to random islands and make up ways to save my life? Merlin, you really need and extracurricular activity. Come back to Camelot, and we'll work on that, okay?

For the last time! I am "The Once and Future King"! You have a lot of nerve to be insulting me, _Mer_lin. Then again, I knew that the day I met you. That was the first of many times you ended up in the dungeons, I believe.

Hmm. _Ar_thur doesn't really role off the tongue like _Mer_lin does. I'd stick to calling me a dollop head if I were you.

Merlin, don't you dare try to stop me from my pickled eggs! You know they're my favorite! I remember that one time I had to pay for Gwaine's picked eggs…and I didn't even get to eat them! That was the main reason you had to polish the knight's boots. I want my pickled eggs!

Here, I'll make a list of why you should come back to Camelot:

Gwen misses you.

My father needs and undercover sorcerer unbeknownst to him.

I need someone to bully.

Gaius needs is son figure.

Morgana needs someone to sneer at.

I need somebody to help me create secret dates with Gwen.

Gwen needs her best friend back.

Gaius needs his helper back.

_Someone _needs to clean my room, polish my boots, etc.

I need to complain to someone about Morgana's smirks.

You need to help me stop Morgana.

You have a destiny to fulfill!

Camelot needs it's undercover-magical-ever-helping-friend to protect it.

I think that's pretty much it. Thirteen reasons should be enough, even if it is an unlucky number.

Yes, Merlin, I figured out the code! I need another one, so I can find you! Please Merlin, please?

Yeah, using magic to light a fire is really going to help me, isn't it _Mer_lin. Thanks a lot. Really appreciate that one, _buddy._

Also, why do you where that neckerchief all the time?

Wishing For Some Pickled Eggs,

Prince Arthur, The Once and Future King with a Great Destiny in His Future.

PS: I stopped calling you an idiot, happy?

PSS: Stop insulting my sausages! I'll have you flogged!

**There you go! By the way, why do you think Merlin where's it all the time? I seriously need help with this, because I cannot fathom why he does.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks to everybody who has been so understanding about my whole flu thing, and the fact that I'll be ending this soon. –sniffles-**

**Review?**

**Oh, and I hope what you like what I did with the neckerchief deal. It was the most popular choice!**

Dear Arthur,

I cannot believe what I just read. In fact, I had to reread it eighteen times, and have the dragon read it to mean nine times! Did you really just say that I wouldn't have to muck out your stables anymore if I come back to Camelot?

Not good enough.

That may have sounded a bit harsh, but if I don't return to Camelot then I won't have to muck out your stables anyway, now will I?

But to answer your question, I'm very happy that you wrote that.

Look, Arthur, you have no idea how hard that decision was! I suspected the Dragon, but I had already made a promise! I swore on my _mother's_ life. And I was hoping that the Dragon would be good, and not do anything bad! But of course he didn't, because nobody has a good moral anymore. Not even Morgana! Hence the reason she's evil.

Poor Sir Leon! I know how annoyed I got watching her smirk all the time, which is one of the reasons I left. That and your arrogant pratness.

Why does everyone start noticing her smirks now that I'm gone? Irony much? I bet it's a conspiracy: "Let's wait till Merlin leaves before we start noticing Morgana's smirks just to annoy him" "Yeah, sounds like a plan!" Clever.

Please, Arthur, who would be a fan girl to you? If anybody would be getting fan girls, it'd be me! After all, I am the one saving your ungrateful butt every day. And by the way, I'm too busy to have an extracurricular activity, because I'm too busy SAVING YOUR LIFE.

You want to talk about thick skulls? You, Arthur Pendragon, have the thickest skull that surrounds your donkey brain!

You're that desperate for the sword? Well, considering that I'll never be seeing you and your prat self again I guess I'll just have to stick it in a random stone. So if you ever see a sword in a stone why don't you try pulling it out? Who knows, it might just work out for you.

Are you seriously making fun of my legendary name? Look, it's not like I chose it or anything! I had about as much say in that name as I did with my destiny. Trust me, I'd prefer to have the destiny of a farmer than ever having to meet you!

I remember when we first met! That just strengthens the fact that you're a prat. Little did I know that one day I'd be the target in target practice! And you wonder why I left.

Do you want me to call you dollop head? Because I can, but I just thought you'd prefer me calling you Arthur.

That's the reason why you made us clean _all _those boots? You do realize that you could've went out and bought some more? You're the Prince of Camelot for goodness sakes! You could easily afford a room full of pickled eggs, so just go out and buy some!

As tempting as that list is, that's not the reason I was looking for. Try again, clot pole, and see what will happen.

You want to know why I wear the neckerchief all the time?

Well, once upon a time a very awesome warlock (and when I say awesome, I mean awesome. The epitome of awesomeness, actually) named Merlin was going to chop firewood on cold winter day for his wonderful mother. Walking happily in the forest without complaining (because Merlin never, ever complained until the day the world's biggest clot pole forced him to it) he saw a red piece of cloth laying randomly on a tree branch. Being cold, the young warlock wrapped it around his neck and may or may not have used magic to get the firewood.

Anyway, Merlin soon returned back to the heart of his home village, and everyone was impressed by his new look. Girls fancied him, and men began to copy his style. Of course, the fad went out of style a year later, but Merlin could never bear to part with the garment that had gained him so much popularity.

So there you have it: I wear my neckerchief not only because it holds good memories, but also compliments my gorgeous blue eyes!

Happy With My Blue Eyes That Are Better Than Yours,

Merlin, Not Needing To Add Anymore To His Name, Because Merlin Says It All.

PS: I'm very happy.

PSS: Okay…you're _way _too obsessed with your sausages. Have you talked to Gaius about this? It could be some kind of medical illness or something…

**There you go! Well, Merlin was awfully mean, wasn't he? Will this letter be the last straw for Arthur? Will 'The Once and Future Prat/King' finally break down? **


	12. Chapter 12

**WARNING: Very long AN ahead.**

**Hello, Merlin fans (as Bradley James would say) I apologize for Arthur being extremely OOC this chapter. When you read it you'll see why.**

**Those of you that are curious about my health (which is probably 1/9 of you) guess what I have now? STREP! Flu then strep. If my throat didn't feel like a badgers armpit (thank you for this wonderful analogy, Gaius) I'd actually find this situation quite ludicrous.**

**By the way, have you ever tried slipping 'your face is wrinkled like a lizards elbow' into the conversation? Or maybe the badgers armpit thing? I have. And all non-Merlin fans (most of my friends. Stupid Pretty Little Liars that dominate us American's lives) give me the oddest looks. But, I still enjoy it so why not, right? Right?**

**You'll either see this chapter as sappy gone overboard, or this will make you ROFL or LOL at the complete stupidity of it. I'm hoping it's the latter, simply because I enjoy making people laugh. But I cannot be sure, because I pretty much gagged myself over the sappiness of it. **

**Also, would you guys mind if I don't update the epilogue until Thursday? It's just that I want the epilogue to be epic, and I'll probably need two days to accomplish that.**

**Finally done with the AN! Review?**

Dear Merlin,

You know what? I'm done with this. I've been looking for you for THREE weeks. And during that time I've had to sleep under trees, make my own fire, carry my own baggage around, saddle my own horse, find my own firewood, set up my own camp, climb through mud, fight off bandits, talk to druids, prepare my own food, and do my own laundry in a CREEK. Do you know how disgustingly vile that is? Not only that, but I've had to bathe there too! And don't even get me started on how creepy it is to have little creatures swimming around while I'm trying to take a bath!

But I can't go back to Camelot without you Merlin, and do you know why that is? It's not because you're a life saver (although that does play a factor in it), but it's because….

Because….

You're my best friend.

There, I said it! Merlin, also known as Emry's is my, Prince Arthur, best friend. If you want me to I'll shout it off the mountain top, I'll say it in front of my father (although I don't think that'll be a good idea, because who knows what lengths he'll go to in order to prevent our friendship), I'll even march into Cendred's Kingdom just to tell him that.

The reason why I always give you a numerous amount of chores is because I don't know what else to do! Me calling you idiot or _Mer_lin is just my way of attempting to show you my friendship for you! Our snide bantering is part of our friendship, _Mer_lin, as is all the chores that go with it!

Do you really think that I'd let anybody call me a prat, clot pole, or dollop head? Only you get that privilege of calling me those names! Have you ever realized that I don't chide you for calling me Arthur in private? It's because we're friends, _Mer_llin, and we always will be!

When I saw your first letter I was shocked out of my mind, and you were right, my first instinct was to turn you in. But then I kept reading and saw how many times you had saved my life, which made our friendship grow stronger to me.

I haven't really been looking for you because Camelot needs you, or the fact that that Guinevere misses you. The truth is Merlin, is that _I _miss you. I miss our bantering, being able to tell you anything without worrying that you're just trying to please me (because God knows that will never happen), and your ability to be wise occasionally.

Also, I've had a craving for rat stew lately, and you need to make me some.

If you come back to Camelot, here's what I'll do for you:

Never make you muck out my stables again.

Buy you a bunch of new neckerchiefs.

Give you fifteen jars of pickled eggs.

Not make fun of you in front of the knights.

Not make you do my laundry once a week every month.

Hold a memorial for your father.

Wear that ridiculous servant hat I made you where that one time you got poisoned for a WHOLE day.

Buy you a new, more comfortable bed.

I almost put down 'listen to your advice', but you know me Merlin, when do I ever listen to you?

If you come back to Camelot (which you should, really, think about it) we can take down Morgana together, prank Sir Leon by adding sugar to his pickled eggs, serve my father rat stew, protect Camelot, talk about my feelings for Guinevere, and pretty much fulfill our destinies. Don't you think that sounds fun Merlin?

Heck, I'll even throw in admitting that your eyes are better looking than mine (even though it's not true).

In Hopes That You'll Come Home Soon,

Arthur, Merlin's Best Friend (He Hopes)

PS: I guess you're not that much of an idiot.

PSS: I'll give up my sausages if you come back.

**See what I mean? Totally OOC! Arthur would NEVER open up his feelings that much at one time (or give up his sausages), but for the sake of this story, he has. I hope you liked it!**


	13. Epilouge

**Thanks to everyone who has helped contribute to make this my most popular story! –grins- I hope you like the epilogue!**

**I'm so sad that this is ending…but life goes on! You all are AWESOME, and I hope to hear from you in my other stories! **

**I've tried adding as many Merlin quotes in here as I can. Can you identify all of them?**

**Review?**

Arthur threw a stick down angrily, letting out a curse about stupid magical servants and how they never listen. The Prince of Camelot had been trying to get the fire going for the past fifteen minutes and still no success.

Stomping away from the unlit campfire spot, Arthur sat on the ground with his back resting against a tree. It had been five days since he sent his reply to Merlin and still no word. It seemed as if Merlin had finally gotten tired of writing to Arthur and had moved on with his life. Probably stuffing himself with pickled eggs.

"Poor arrogant fat prince can't light his own fire." A familiar voice said behind some trees. Arthur's head whipped up.

"Merlin?"

"_Forbearnan_," And the campfire was magically lit, literally, "The one and only!" The jolly voice said, observing his best friend, "You know, if you didn't sit around all day you would be in better shape."

"I'm fighting fit!"

"And we want to keep you that way."

The Prince of Camelot stood abruptly stood up, "You bumpkin! I've been running around looking for you for _weeks!_ In that time I haven't had a proper bed, a proper bath, ate or drank clean water, and I haven't even see Guinevere! Do have any idea how hard that was?"

Merlin bit his lip and looked away, "Very hard, I suppose, sire."

"_Mer_lin, are you laughing at me?"

The young warlock's red face turned away out of Arthur's view, "N-no."

"You are! You think this is funny!"

Facing Arthur, Merlin grinned, "Maybe just a little."

"_Mer_lin!"

"Whoa, somebody hasn't had their breakfast yet."

"I'll have you for breakfast! You've been gone for weeks, ignoring your destiny, not to mention your servant duties!" With that Arthur charged at Merlin.

"Wait! I have a peace offering!" With that Merlin revealed a jar and Arthur froze.

"Is that…?"

"Pickled eggs."

For a moment Arthur just stared in silence, but then he became elated, "Gimme!"

The servant willingly handed over the pickled eggs, and watched as his master began to munch down the delicious food.

"When was the last time you've eaten?"

"A decent meal? Before I left Camelot." Arthur mumbled in between bites.

"And you still haven't lost that much weight? I really think you should see Gaius about this."

"Shut up, Merlin."

The boys settled down by the campfire. Arthur finished up the jar of pickled eggs, and turned his focus to Merlin.

"So you're a sorcerer?"

"Warlock."

"What?"

"Warlock. It's different from a sorcerer."

"Ok…well, thanks for coming back."

Merlin grinned.

"Don't look so pleased with yourself. Just because you have magic doesn't mean I've forgotten your lazy insolent ways or the fact that you called me a clot pole, dollop head, and 'The Once and Future Prat'. I will say, however, that I have….missed you."

The young warlock, not sorcerer mind you, studied the prince intently. All he could come up with, "You've ruined your clothes!"

"Don't worry, you can mend it."

Rolling his eyes at Arthur, Merlin began to concentrate on making the embers of the fire turn into a dragon.

"You're a riddle, Merlin. I never have been able to figure you out."

"Oh, but I had you figured out the first time I met you. You're supercilious, condescending, patronizing, and overbearing. Very overbearing."

"I'm beginning to think that I should've never asked you to come back."

Merlin stood up and brushed leaves off his pants, "Guess I'll be going then."

"Sit down, Merlin." And the sorcerer did as he was told. Suddenly Arthur looked terribly uncomfortable.

"I just…wanted…to..um…say…um…thank you…for um…saving my life so many times."

Whilst Arthur had been stuttering this out, a very serious look was on Merlin's face. But when the statement was finished, the most euphoric grin crossed his face.

"You still going to buy me a new neckerchief?"

"Yes, I'll buy you a red baby bib. Color suits you, Merlin."

"It does not look like a baby bib!"

Arthur smirked, "Whatever you say, Merlin."

"I still have your letters." Merlin commented, patting the brown satchel beside him. Arthur raised his eyebrows.

"Ah…and what are you…planning to do with these letters?"

A wicked grin crossed Merlin's face, "Oh, nothing. I'm not going to tell anybody that you wrote these, or tell them that you admitted I was your best friend."

"Merlin, if you dare tell anyone about this, I promise I will make your life a living hell."

"You mean more than you already do?"

Arthur nodded, "Yeah."

"What will you tell your father about all of…this?"

"What does my father matter?"

"Well, that's one way of approaching things."

"So, are you going to fulfill your destiny and help me become a great king of Camelot?"

Silence.

"Merlin."

"Nah, I don't really fancy it."

"You don't have a choice, Merlin."

The dark haired boy grinned, "Alright, fine. It's going to be quite difficult, though. I wonder if anybody else has to transform 'The Once and Future Prat' into 'The Once and Future King'. It's very difficult."

Before Arthur could respond, there was a screeching roar in the distance. Both of the boys recognized it, and the blue eyes connected.

"What that…a wildren?" Arthur questioned.

"Time to find some gileberries."


End file.
